H.O.P.E a Pathway to the Future

Over the past few days I have watched the world news with a new perspective. In the past it would just make me angry to see how the people of this world are being manipulated by a few people in high places.

How could the people of today so easily buy into the arguments that are so obviously tainted and presented in a way that supports the views of a few, while the world, as a whole, is in such pain?

Have we no hope? Then, it hit me; there must be a message in hope we are missing.

As I prayed about hope, a new perspective began to form in my spirit. Hope, although a state of mind is also a metaphor for a process each of us must go through. The world as a whole is in one of the steps of H.O.P.E., but each individual must seek to get through all steps if they can fully understand why they are here on this earth.

I will begin by explaining the four steps;

H – Hosea 10:3

“They go around saying, “Who needs a king? We couldn’t care less about God, so why bother with a king? What difference would he make?” (The Message)

In this step we believe we are capable of everything. We have all the knowledge we need and we are full of self love, self confidence, and pride. We believe we have most, if not all the answers and anyone who disagrees with us is ignorant or at least unenlightened. We are the masters of our lives and have full trust in our own ability to govern and direct our lives.

Many people throughout history have been is this step. I believe that is where America was just prior to the Great Depression. Laws had little meaning; authority of any kind was just a hindrance to what the people wanted to do. Spending was out of control and people thought the end of prosperity could never end. But it did.

The people of Germany were in this stage just prior to World War II. They managed to come out of the debt and demoralization of a loss in World War I and were now well on their way to becoming a world power. No one would ever step on them again. The Jewish people in Germany, and all of Europe for that matter, were some of the most prosperous people in the world. Their skills and influence were unrivaled anywhere, no one would lie to them, they were too aware of the world around them. And along came Hitler.

O – Obadiah 1:7

“All your old partners will drive you to the edge. Your old friends will lie to your face. Your old drinking buddies will stab you in the back. Your world will collapse. You won’t know what hit you”. (The Message)

Human failings; those in whom you thought you could trust; let you down. They didn’t just let you down; they dropped you, and then turned against you. In this step you learn about treachery and betrayal. You found that you did not have all the answers as you thought in the earlier step, now you put your trust in someone who thinks like you. Perhaps it was a catchy campaign slogan, or maybe it was similarities in human endeavor. What ever the connection, you put your trust in another person or group. They turned against you like a jackal after a piece of meat.

I have seen a lot of people in this step in the Church. Even more lately in the business world, with the layoffs and the wild fluctuations in the economy. Putting your trust in another man is doomed to turn out badly and leave you hurting.

P – I Peter 1:22

“Since you have purified your souls in obeying the truth through the Spirit in sincere love of the brethren, love one another fervently with a pure heart” (NKJV)

In this step you enter into obedience. You finally come to the point that you no longer trust in your own ability to make the right choices. You recognize that there must be something more than what you have experienced in life to date. You have failed yourself, other people and theories have failed you, now you must recognize your weakness and turn to the power of a God who is never changing. Consistency and security are the major drivers for you to seek out some relationship with God.

You are looking for healing and you find it in the arms of a loving God.

E – Emanuel

“Behold, a virgin shall be with child and shall bring forth a Son, and they shall call His name Emmanuel” (which being interpreted is, “God with us”). (KJ21)

This is the realization of hope. When you finally come to the realization that God is truly with us, when He becomes more than a great and terrible entity that no one can look on much less touch, when intimacy with Jesus becomes reality in you life. This is hope.

God with us means so much more than the name Mary gave a baby. God with us was the proclamation of the journey every man must make from that day forward. The journey through every step of HOPE ending with a personal and intimate relationship with the God of all creation. The journey that moves from love of self to real love.

Someone very close to me, who lives on the other side of our great country, must have been touched by the same spirit that encouraged this blog. In her blog, Joy In the Morning, she writes about the death of hope. But it is, in the end, the realization that “the death of Hope in reality is the death of what I thought should happen and the resurrection of what truly should be”.

There in lies the truth about hope; it is a journey from self dependence to complete dependence. This journey is the process called H.O.P.E.

En servicio como padre
Dave

Providence

Not too far from my home, here in the state of Georgia, is a beautiful canyon named Providence Canyon. The canyon is made up of several gorges that intersect, the deepest being about 150 feet. The canyon walls offer incredible views of soil layers colored in various reds, white, browns even black. The canyon is often called, by the locals, the Grand Canyon of Georgia.

Having grown up in Arizona, I have to admit, I was a little disappointed when I first saw Providence Canyon because I expected something more vast. That being said, Providence Canyon offers a view that is hard to get in many parts of our great country.

What makes this such an awesome place is the history. Providence canyon is not the result of millions of years of erosion caused by a mighty river, it is not even the result of thousands of years of wind and rain erosion. Providence Canyon is just short of 200 years old.

Historical accounts indicate that the canyon began forming in the early 1800s as the result of poor soil-management practices. Most of the native forest had been cleared to allow for farming. Early-nineteenth-century farmers in this region took no measures to avoid soil erosion their attention being on farming the land. Small gullies formed and rapidly grew deeper by 1850 ditches three to five feet deep had been cut into the land, further concentrating runoff and increasing the rate of erosion. By the early 1900s, chasms had given way to gorges and homes and even the Providence Methodist church fell victim to the rampant erosion.

By contrast, in 1947, Cason Jewell Callaway purchased a 13,000 acre cotton farm that had been farmed to the extent that it had been stripped of it’s nutrients. Through selective agriculture and environmental management practices the Callaway family turned what could have been an environmental disaster into one of the most beautiful places in the United States, Callaway Gardens.

The contrast of these two stories is interesting enough in itself. But as a father, they point to a lesson for all of us.

Every family, at some time, is subject to circumstances that leave us vacant and stripped of all apparent value. Our actions and those of others often begin to cause small rivulets in the fundamental fabric of what is our family. If left unchecked, these small rivulets become gauges that eventually become irrevocable gorges.

It is our responsibility as fathers to correct the damage caused by societal pressures and put down and feed the roots of strong family values. Teaching and modeling stong Christian ethics and honesty will nourish a healthy and growing family.

It is not providence when a child or a whole family fails. Providence is just the opposite. The American Heritage Dictionary defines providence as:

prov·i·dence (prv-dns, -dns) NOUN: 1. Care or preparation in advance; foresight. 2. Prudent management; economy. 3.The care, guardianship, and control exercised by a deity; divine direction: “Some sought the key to history in the working of divine providence” (William Ebenstein). 4. Providence God. (The American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language, Fourth Edition. Copyright © 2000 by Houghton Mifflin Company.)

Like Cason Jewell Callaway, it is our providence to invest in what some would see as failure and turn it into something beautiful.

As fathers it is our calling, by a loving God, to use care, guardianship, and control to provide divine direction.

With His help we can not fail.

En Servicio Como Padre

Dave

True Warriors Wear Pink

A few days ago, I happened to wear a very nice pink shirt to the office.  As I settled in to begin the day, a coworker walked past my office; “Good morning Dave” was his greeting, to which I gave an equally cheery retort.  “I takes a real man to wear pink”, were his next words.

 I’ve heard those words before, most often in jest, a kind of friendly banter between men that seems to happen any time more than one man is present in the same place.  This time, though, the words pricked something in me that caused me to ponder the concept as a father.

 It’s not one of those macho things.  I’ve long ago learned there is little in that mind set that really helps a father be what he is meant to be.  It caused me to ask myself; what sets you, as a father, apart from other men?

 It is often in man’s nature to be competitive.  Competition is valued in society today.  The more competitive you are the better the chance to be successful in business.  It is the mantra of the millennial man.  Competition often defines who the world thinks we are. 

 It can’t be all bad.  After all, it is that competitive spirit that helped early man feed and protect his family, but competition only takes a father so far.  At some point, the competition, if too strong, begins to tear away at the relationships with a father’s children and even with his spouse. 

 I have known several men in my years who could rightly be described as a giant.  These men were all over 6 feet 9 inches tall and were imposing in their very presence.  Some were fathers others were married, with no children, and all were noticed when the entered any room.  Today, I still have contact with a couple of them but it is not their sheer size that would cause me to set them apart as a father.  An equally large woman would likely be just as imposing but probably could not be described as a father.  I have known great fathers who were as short as these men were tall.

 My position in life has given me the opportunity to meet many men who have been very successful in their selected career field.  These men are entrusted with large sums of money or large segments of a company.  They have shown their ability to understand business and to encourage others to follow the mission they have conveyed.  They are eloquent in their speech and adept at getting their point across in a manner that is accepted by their most ardent opposition.  Some lead hundreds, others thousands as they guide their company along the road to success.  They are successful by almost any standard but that alone doesn’t set them apart as a father.

 Fatherhood is by all accounts a battle.  When their child is born, a father begins to fight against everything that would attempt to harm or negatively influence his child.  Sometimes the battles are perceived and some are misinterpreted but others are very real.

 The warrior father stands between every potential danger and at the same time guards the pathways to a child’s heart.  He alone holds a secret entrance that can only be unlocked by the keys of influence.  As a child watches their father the influence key unlocks understanding and a child grows in knowledge and stature.

 Clarence Budington Kelland, the American writer of the 20’s, most noted for his fiction and short stories published in magazines of the time, explained it best when he described his father with the following:

 “He didn’t tell me how to live; he lived, and let me watch him do it”. Clarence Budington Kelland

 Proverbs 4:1-4 describes the power of influence the warrior father has with his child;

1.Listen, friends, to some fatherly advice; sit up and take notice so you’ll know how to live.2.I’m giving you good counsel; don’t let it go in one ear and out the other.3.When I was a boy at my father’s knee, the pride and joy of my mother,4.

He would sit me down and drill me: “Take this to heart. Do what I tell you – live!  (The message)

 The warrior father is differentiated by the tenacity by which he fights for what he loves and by the compassion which he metes upon his family.  The child of the warrior father learns by his example and in the long run recognizes that it really does take a real man to wear pink.

En servicio como padre

Dave

Honor your father

Ephesians 6:1-4

1 Children, do what your parents tell you. This is only right. 2 ”Honor your father and mother” is the first commandment that has a promise attached to it, namely, 3 ”so you will live well and have a long life.” 4 Fathers, don’t exasperate your children by coming down hard on them. Take them by the hand and lead them in the way of the Master. (The Message)

As this Fathers Day approaches, I find myself reflecting on many things.  I think of my own father, how in many ways he was distant and a man of few words.  He was hard working and was skilled in so many areas I only wish, today, that I had spent more time with him learning from him.  He was not a perfect father, no, far from it.  He was quick to temper and often disciplined out of temper rather than strategic learning.  He was not formally educated and did not encourage me to excel in school.  He was not rich and was not a master of financial investment or budgetary restraint.

No, my father was not perfect, but he loved his children.  No matter how much discipline he meted out, or how much he would yell at us when we pushed his buttons, we all knew he loved us.

My most vivid memory of my father was on the day I was leaving to go into the military.  It was during the Vietnam War, and I left a perfectly good job to sign up for the military.  I was certain I would be drafted and would have little control over the branch of service I would enter, so I chose to get ahead of the game and enlist.  When I told my parents, they were livid.  They could not understand why I would enlist and not take my chances on the draft.  My mother was so mad she would not talk to me.  My father, trying to keep the peace in his own way, went to his work shed and made himself scarce.  I felt my whole family was against my decision.

Early the next morning I boarded a Greyhound bus headed for the big city of Phoenix Arizona where I would go through my final activities before heading off to basic training.  I said my goodbyes to my girlfriend the night before so I was by myself at 6:00 a.m. as I looked around the town of my birth for what could be the last time. 

From the bus window I scanned the small Arizona town until my eyes fell upon a man standing in the shadows.  It was my father.  I hurried off the bus like a salmon swimming up stream against the flow of others boarding the same bus.  As I walked up to my father, he extended a hand shake, his way of saying goodbye.  

He then reached in his pocket and pulled out a ten dollar bill.  It was all he ever carried.  To him it was his lifeline. He used that ten dollars to buy his tobacco and papers to roll his own cigarettes.  It was money he kept in case of an emergency.  With a family of eight kids and a janitors position, it was a lot of money to him.  With that he stuffed the bill in my pocked and said “thought you might need this”.

Those words though not eloquent or ground shaking in the least, were powerful to my soul.  My father took all he had and invested it in me, knowing I would not fail.  His few words were supportive in that he arose early and made his way to the bus stop in support of what I was doing.  In those few words he more than communicated his love to me.

I only saw my father a few times in the years that followed that night.  Life had taken me far from home and my visits were few and short.  One day as I arrived home from work my wife met me and said she just received a phone call that my father was gravely ill and the family was being called in to see him for the last time. 

I did not get home in time, my father died while I was in route, by train, to my home town.

Was my father a hero?  Was my father a master of fatherhood?  No, not in the eyes of any outsider who knew little of him.  But to me, and to my brothers and sisters, he was all of those things and more.  He was a man who sacrificed all to show his love.

En servicio como padre

Dave

Please take a moment to honor a father your have come to know as a hero.  Tell me and my readers about this father, in the comments below, and we will help you honor him this weekend in our prayers and thoughts.  Then email this link to others that they might also receive the promise of Ephesians 6:2.

http://dadtalk.wordpress.com

A Father’s Choice

Sometimes I wonder if I have made some really bad choices in my life.  I was raised to believe that we have to live the consequences of our choices, no matter if we were sorry for them or not.

Then I think about my own children.  If they make bad choices, I as a Father, want them to experience the weight of these choices only to the extent that they recognize their mistake and learn to avoid them in the future.  I could/would not stand aside and allow them to go under just to learn a lesson.  If I have the resources to help them out of their circumstance;  I will, and have had opportunity to, do so.

I don’t think I am better than God.  If I would use all my resources so would He.  His resources are limitless.  If God is for us, who can be against us?(Romans 8:31)

Our God will help us through anything we can face.  He will use all His resources and will restore all we have lost seven times over. (Proverbs 6:31) If only we will recognize the unique relationship He longs to have with us. Think of the relationship you strive to have with your children, why would He be any different in His desire for you?

Lord help us to know where to turn.  What is our next step?  Even when all doors seem to be closed, make it clear to us what we need to do or be looking for at this present time.  Amen

En Servicio Como Padre

Dave

The Windshield and Love for a Child

 

 

As I was driving through an industrial section of town, a few days ago, I happened to notice a windshield repair company sitting next to, of all things, a child care.

Thinking the site a little odd, I gave a moment of thought to the meaning of both.

I thought of the reasons for there to be a windshield repair establishment in this part of town.  With the industrial nature of the area, it is not uncommon for sand and relatively large gravel to coat the street, more than likely having fallen from large dump trucks conveying sand and gravel from nearby pits for use in manufacturing facilities in the area.

These grains of sand and gravel can be picked up by tires of passing vehicles and rocketed into the windshield of other vehicles.  Each grain of sand striking the glass on oncoming vehicles digs into the smooth surface gouging a very small, almost imperceptible, piece of glass.  Each strike rendering damage that is almost impossible to repair.

With each successive grain of sand, another crater is created, moment by moment, day upon day, the onslaught continues as the drivers pass by unaware of the damage being done.  Slowly the accumulation of gouges and craters take away a portion of the smooth, transparent surface of the windshield, until there are more damaged areas than not.

The final recourse is to replace the windshield altogether and discard the damaged one.  The only way to avoid repeated damage to the new windshield is to take another path to work.

The child care, not unlike the glass repair establishment, takes in children in varying stages of injury.  Some are injured by well meaning parents who, in an effort to control or guide their children, use harsh words or cutting criticism that tear away small pieces of the shining new surface of an innocent child’s heart.  In most cases parents don’t intend harm.  They are running late for work, or the traffic is heavy, they are working in a high stress situation and the child is not cooperative.  Sometimes they are just trying to help the child avoid the same mistakes they have made themselves.  Perhaps their child will be more successful than they are.

What ever the reason, moment by moment, day upon day, the onslaught continues, as parents go about their lives unaware of the subtle damage their words are doing.  Each word, however intended, creating gouges and craters in the pure shining heart of a child, created by God, and given everything necessary to be successful in life.  Slowly this accumulation of gouges and craters tears away enough of the heart of the child that they slip into something they were not created to be.

There is no way to remove the old, damaged heart of a child and replace it with a new one.  Every attempt to do so will, in fact, drive the child further from who they are and into someone they are not.

Fortunately the child, unlike the windshield, can be repaired.  As parents we must pay close attention to the words we use and the actions we take.  We must audit our intentions and assure they are driven by love and not some other reason.

We are told in Proverbs “Pleasant words are a honeycomb, Sweet to the soul and healing to the bones”. (Proverbs 16:24)

Nothing is truer; we can control the words we speak.  If we understand the impact of what we say, we can make a difference in the lives of our children.

Like a shiny new windshield, we hold, in our children, a certain amount of satisfaction.  Knowing we can safely see what the future brings.

Keep them clean and mind the roads you direct them down and your words of love will heal their broken and pitted hearts.

En servicio como padre

Dave

Who is your favorite Veteran…Memorial Day 2009

Happy Memorial Day!

Half way through this Memorial Day weekend it dawned on me that, being a veteran, it would be really cool if someone provided a place for readers to tell the story of their favorite veteran.

Padre Steve in his blog Padtesteve’s World did a magnificent job of remembering the great men and women who have had a significant impact on his life and career. I highly recommend you check in on his post: “Remembering the Veterans in my Life….Memorial Day 2009″.

Before you go, take a moment to comment on this blog about Your favorite Veteran. My readers and I would be extremely grateful and proud to read about those who have and still are putting their country ahead of their personal ambitions to make our lives a little safer.

I will lift each one up in a prayer of thanksgiving for their sacrifice, and pray for their good health and protection. I further encourage everyone who reads these accounts to do the same. It is the least we can do on this Memorial Day 2009.

God Bless you all.

En Servicio Como Padre

Dave

Bowling and the American Way of Life

Do you ever feel like you are on a game show called “Bowling for Recognition”?

The purpose of the game is for you to stand right next to a bunch of your fellow workers as your boss rolls one ball after another at you until he knocks you down.

If you happen to be the last one standing, then, you get some recognition.

Much in the American way of life has begun to feel that way for countless Americans. No matter how hard you try, there seems to be someone rolling that ball at you.

The outcome of this way of life is loss of pride, self respect, confidence, and our willingness to step outside the boundaries to try something new.
What I see happening in the life of Americans, is a slow abdication of our desire and ability to create.

With the loss of creativity comes the inability to dream. Without dreams we loose the ability to get excited about the possible. Once we loose the ability to consider possibilities, we begin to focus on the material. Focused totally upon material items, man now becomes enslaved to the means by which he acquires material goods, and finally, man becomes less creative.

Each successive cycle, from loss of creativity to loss of creativity, take us further from a relationship and understanding of the Creator that made us.

As we draw further from the Creator, we feel less sure and more vulnerable. Being more vulnerable creates stress. Stress layered upon stress, creates and unhealthy environment and sickness and/or depression take their toll on the human body.

The American way of life has become a series of chain reactions much like the bowling pins. One falls, striking the next and the next until a huge part of what we have known is missing.

Too many of us have made this American way of life a god to us. “To have and to hold”, in the marriage vows, has taken on a material tone. We have become less spiritual and more material with each successive generation.
The hopelessness of the situation has caused many to seek relief in the form of anger, drugs, sex, alcohol, gambling, atheism, and the blind vote for anyone who promises change.

The answer to the whole situation is unbelievably simple. If we return to where we started, back to where creation began, we will find the answer. You see, creation is the beginning of life, and in life there is hope, and in hope there is promise, and in fulfilled promise, there is joy, and in joy there is more life.

In the beginning; “God spoke: “Let us make human beings in our image, make them reflecting our nature So they can be responsible for the fish in the sea, the birds in the air, the cattle, And, yes, Earth itself, and every animal that moves on the face of Earth.” God created human beings; he created them godlike, Reflecting God’s nature. He created them male and female. God blessed them: “Prosper! Reproduce! Fill Earth! Take charge! Be responsible for fish in the sea and birds in the air, for every living thing that moves on the face of Earth.” Then God said, “I’ve given you every sort of seed-bearing plant on Earth And every kind of fruit-bearing tree, given them to you for food. To all animals and all birds, everything that moves and breathes, I give whatever grows out of the ground for food.” And there it was. God looked over everything he had made; it was so good, so very good! It was evening; it was morning – Day Six”. (Genesis 1: 26-31; The Message)

It is good, so very good! Get off the receiving end of the bowling alley. A relationship with God, returns us to the heart of Love and Life.

En Servicio Como Padre

The Night Light

What father hasn’t been jolted out of bed by the cries of their child racked by nightmares?

Nightmares of gross monsters under the bed, or evil bad men hiding in the dark corners of the room, possibly a wicked witch flying around the ceiling deep enough into the darkness that they could not be easily seen.

What father has not calmly sat beside their frightened child with the lights on to convince them that there is nothing in these places?

The dark of the night seems to bring out the worst in the minds of our children. Thoughts so vivid they are undoubtedly real to the small child.

I remember some of these dreams from my childhood. Although I now blame much of my fear of the dark upon the original Kind Kong movie I saw on television one night with my older brothers and sisters. Though a fantasy, my older siblings did what they could to convince me it was real, that fear ran deep in my mind for many years.

Most of these nightmares are generally harmless and in most cases the ultimate answer to the problem is very simple.

   The Night Light.

The night light is an amazing invention. A very small wattage light bulb, with some cover, usually a theme known to the child as positive, e.g.: Toy Story, Cinderella, Dora the Explorer, etc; plugged into an electrical socket in plain view of the child.

This devise provides just enough light to supply a measure of comfort but not enough to prevent sleep.

A child awakened by uncomfortable dreams is reassured by the light that all is the same as when they said their night time prayers. The comfort of this simple light is enough to quell the fears, in most cases, and the child returns to their much needed slumber.

In our older children, we as parents often play the role of the night light in their lives. As the pressures of school or work build, thought of potentially devastating outcomes take the place of these childhood nightmares. Often these thoughts are not any more real than the proverbial monster under the bed, but our child needs reassurance.

As fathers we provide insights into the real situation that our children often face. We can speak in love and out of experience to the logical outcomes and the long term impact of many perceived issues.

In effect, we become the night light to our older children.

Likewise, we as parents, sometimes face monsters of our own. In these cases where do we turn? What options do we have?

  I believe the answers to both of these questions in our relationship with God. Like the frightened child we often see in limited ways during our times of darkness. We awaken to what we perceive as a true situation and we cry out for help. All the while God is there providing the light that will calm our fears. Reminding us that things are not what we think. He is in control and we can rest in his light.

Our job is to understand this simple truth and teach it to our children so they can live a healthier and happier life, free from the monsters under the bed.

En Servicio Como Padre

My Christian Blogs

I recently ran across a new web site that I think might be a great resource for those of you who like to read Christian blogs.  It is My Chistian Blogs, http://mychristianblogs.com/.  The idea is that you can find all the best Christian blogs in one place.  Check it out, you might find the reading interesting.

En Servicio Como Padre