Am I Worthy of Love?

Can you imagine the guys are gathering in front of the television before the big game. Charlie inters the room with a platter of buffalo hot wings, a bag of pork rinds, and chips with salsa. He wears a troubled look on his face. Bill, the sensitive one of the group, notices the underlying emotion and queries Charlie about it. Without hesitation Charlie announces to the group of men, “I’ve been thinking; am I worthy of love?

In another case; a group of neighbors are sharing the afternoon by grilling steaks and hot dogs in the backyard of one of the families. As the men joke and interact with one another, the group suddenly enters into an impassioned discussion around the question; “Am I worthy of love”?

Or, how about two men are laboring to change the water pump on an old 1969 Plymouth Road Runner. As one tightens a bolt the wrench slips and he mashes his finger against the engine block. As he regains his composure he comments. “man that really hurts. It kind of made me think, am I worthy of love”?

Something tells me none of these scenarios are likely to occur in groups of men anywhere in the world. It’s simply not a question commonly discussed among men.

Yet, it is one of the greatest areas of insecurity among men today.

Most men today struggle, in one way or another, wit their identity. In fact, Bill Perkins, in hi book Six Battles Every Man Must Win: Tyndale House, 2004, lists “Fight for Your Identity” as the very first battle. If you don’t win this battle you have no hope of ever getting through the other five.

For the majority of men, their identity is tied up in their relationship with their father. If they could not get some level of acceptance, some level of love, with their father, their heart was wounded deeply. Over time this would gets covered over with more junk fro life and the wound is never healed.

With an aching would in their heart, men move on in their lives and begin to self-medicate to avoid the pain. They self-medicate with sports, work, sexual exploitation, drugs, alcohol, and a whole host of other things they hope will distract them from the pain.

This pain can not be healed until a man comes to the point in his life when he begins to ponder the question; “Am I worthy of love”?

His past has certainly not encouraged a positive answer. Without intervention, without healing, a man’s relationship with his wife, his children, close friends, can not and will not develop in a healthy way. He will continue to go through the motions and remain that wounded little boy who could not measure up to his father’s expectations. A child unworthy of his father’s love, unworthy of love at all.
As men, as fathers, as friends, we must realize the impact to this wound. We must turn to God, in the form of Jesus Christ, who can move aside all the trash of life and by His love go straight to the heart and heal that wound. Only through the perfect love of Christ, will we be able to answer this question in the positive. Only by knowing how perfectly God loves us can we begin to understand how limiting a wounded heart is and begin to live our lives in freedom from the pain of a wounded heart.

En servicio como padre


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